Are you being your authentic self and does purpose align with this?

Does everyone even have a purpose? If so, where does authenticity fit in it? I believe we do have a purpose and it will look different for everyone. Away from what the western culture has taught us that it’s some magical career path or activists position connected to one thing. I think for some it could be to raise a child in this lifetime, for lessons or growth around that, or for some it could be to make a specific change for this planet. There could be so many variations. But I think purpose is the reason why you wake up every day, it’s about the sense of oneness where you feel you are giving an offering for good to make someone feel loved, to offer a service, to offer a great product, or to make a change for greater good.

We don’t have to take this path but I believe if our only outcome is to have an exchange for short wins like material objects, extrinsic validation, toxic love, the stuff we have been sold that makes us happy, you won’t receive the fulfilment and richness or grounded happiness that allows you to then show up as your most authentic self.

If you are living via your purpose you will feel a deeper, rich fulfilment everyday. If you are living it fully and authentically, you won’t be feeling like everyday you are going through the motions of the ‘way’ we should show up which is a forced toxic masculine energy. We would be moving through it with inspired feminine energy which doesn’t feel like work and just flows.

How does masculine energy impact our actions

Let me explain a bit more so the information that comes out of your mouth and action when you are fully fired- in a state of passion, joy, honestly or gratitude is often the space where we are taking inspired positive masculine action basically when we’re ‘not over thinking’ and just do. The toxic and forced masculine is when we are following a rule book. Doing the things Google said we should do to get where we need to or all the other people you follow on social platforms comparable to your job or brand. It is doing what we are conditioned to do, such as to be in a job that makes us deeply unhappy to go to. Build a career based on parents’ expectations. Appear prestige to others, maybe our family or friends, because we believe if we fake it for so long happiness or our desires will come. The possibility of failure means we are not enough and worthy of love, acceptance or belonging.

This is dangerous because it can draw you so far away from your purpose as the danger is we master performative behaviour. Showing up as someone we are not, by saying and doing it so much we convince ourselves and others that we should and that is our life.

You have to live an authentic life in order to truly live your purpose

So if purpose is the reflection of authenticity and vice versa. I think your purpose is where it starts because we can’t live an authentic life if we are not living our true purpose. But we can find our path and still some up in a performative manner within it. Let me explain. For example, I help Women work authentically within their purpose. My life’s purpose is to mentor women but if I wasn’t mentoring just women or mentoring by methods that other people use connected to my field of work, I wouldn’t be showing up as an authentic mentor. Authenticity comes into play when we unpack our own insecurities and trauma reasons of imposter syndrome. Not being enough to have the courage to always show up as our best self even if that is not shiny some days and not as articulate as other days. If I wasn’t living authentically as myself and embracing and working through the growth, challenges and hardship, I wouldn’t be in my purpose authentically.

So if you are doubting your authenticity or looking and feeling like you are in apart of your life purpose lets start here.

How to find our real purpose..

I think purpose comes from a space of when you remove all our distractions around us that you do subconsciously. Start there, try and spend at least 10 minutes in your present each day. Not just going through the motions of life but pausing on your own. Write down the things that aligned with your morals, the things that made you feel seen or felt passion around. The conversations that intrigued you. The things you would research or connect to when you weren’t doing your day to day tasks. That is the beginnings of finding your path.

Authenticity, I believe, is a process of the above but it truly is mixed with the journey and vulnerability that you experience when you are in your present. You feel brave enough to take accountability or start to unpack the layers that trigger you. The things in the day that would make you feel upset, or maybe embarrassment or shame to hide or fix? Until we can be brave enough to unpack our own layers, we can’t rewire our thought process to move forward.

There is for sure a journey to both of these things and I will be honest, my network or people around me and my mentor help guide me to where I am. So if this is a journey you are struggling with alone, think about what you truly want…and not what looks like ‘success’ to the outward world, and connect to it. In people, mentors, books. If you are willing to do the work, I think you will see the answers and pathways will present themselves to you. You have to practice patience and understand that it can take time and there is no quick route. Again, like the western world has sold to us for happiness, fulfilment or success.

Love always,

Laura